Thursday, October 28, 2010

No Regrets

For all of Kama's life, I have had a slight addiction to the vet. Not because I wanted to, but because I had to. Dave always thought my hunches were just that. Time and again, the poor guy was proven wrong.

I knew my baby girl like no other. 

Once I realized she was very sick, I decided to treat her as though she were going to die. I was to now treat her as though she only had minutes, hours, or days to live.

After about 5-6 hours of this, I came to a realization.

There was no difference.

For her entire life, I treated her as if there were no tomorrow.

I loved her like no other. I shared every moment with her, as you may remember from my Kama post. I felt the truest, purest form of love with her that I have ever experienced.

Yes, I love my family as wide as the ocean is deep, but as for the truest, purest form of love, I often question if I am only capable of having that with a doggie?

Kama was the best to me, and most of all, she brought out the best in me.

Throughout my entire life, I have sometimes been hurtful to a family member or even a friend. Human relationships can sometimes be so complicated. Every moment with Kama was never ending bliss. I appreciated every second like it was our last, and for that I will forever be grateful.


 With no regrets

And piece of mind
Lived so much in so little time
I’m so glad when she was here
She was mine
From the day we met
To the night she left
I loved her
No regrets

Well time and fate can't be controlled
You play the hand that you’re dealt
And the dice that you rolled
And who am I to question God anyway
Well these days when I look back
I know I’m blessed have been loved like that
I still miss her everyday

With no regrets

And piece of mind
Lived so much in so little time
I’m so glad when she was here
She was mine
From the day we met
To the night she left
I loved her
No regrets

From the day we met
To the night she left
I loved her
No regrets
No regrets
I loved her
With no regrets

~ Gary Allan

4 comments:

  1. find solace in gfa always my friend.

    love of your kama was truest & pure because she loved you unconditionally no matter your human flaws

    people love you too, but people are flawed and flaws see flaws if that makes nay sense at all

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  2. Jen, I love this. In the face of unspeakable heartache you KNOW without a doubt that you wouldn't have done anything different. Trina (almost) never thought she was going to die and I can honestly say that if we had been told the day she was diagnosed that she would only have 8 months to live I can honestly say that there is not ONE THING that we would have done differently than what we did. No regrets. It's a shitty situation to be in to HAVE to think about regrets but it's calming to have no regrets.

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  3. I just bought the book, "A Dog's Purpose" It sounds like a great read and has several great reviews by people who just lost their best friend. I had my 14 year old chow/retriever put to sleep in June and miss him terribly. I was finally this weekend able to adopt another one. I can't wait to start reading the book myself.

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  4. Dogs provide a different kind of love. It's an unconditional, everlasting love. They don't care if your hair is sticking straight up and you have horrible morning breath. They don't talk back, they don't complain. They just love you. *hugs*

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