Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Work It Baby

Oh the places I go to keep myself in good, and working order : )


As you may know, I bake...a lot. Mostly pie, but if it has flour, sugar and butter, chances are...I'll bake it too! Latest baked good - last night - Nutella Banana Bread!

This includes our once a week Pie Night. Amy comes over and we have dinner together, Dave gets Aviana ready for bed, unless it's a night he plays football, then we do. And then, we read to Aviana and put her to bed. Pie Night is now called Pie Night, but it is made up of so many things, it's actually a catch all. It has even recently involved the de-weeviling of our entire kitchen. Yes, you heard me...we caught weevils from Whole Foods. Google that! 

But really, it usually involves Dave asking us, many times, when we might start our pies, as we sit twirling our hair and think about it as we watch Kip Moore videos on You Tube until midnight. And then, yes, we do end up in the kitchen making pie at around midnight...

But Pie Night is a life saver for all involved, we listen to music, we dance, we do our hair, sometimes our make up, we bake, we put our aprons on our heads, but we wouldn't want you to think we wear them to bake, as they are purely for more singing and dancing while using a whisk and spatula as the mic in front of the mirror. We watch videos, movie clips, SNL skits, and Bon Qui Qui. We laugh, we cry, we laugh until we cry, we laugh until we cry, until we pee our pants and then cry some more because we then have to clean up pee. As you can see, we travel in circles and act just like we did in 7th grade. It's a much needed night of the week, for so many reasons.


This is one of the best things for me, and I know it. So I guess I'm still a little mystified as to why Maggy's answer to my question of, "when was the last time I was here?" was, "well, you were thinking about making a pie." That was a year ago. I haven't been to counseling in a year? That is too long. I was doing that well that I didn't think I needed counseling? Even with what happened to Aviana in March? That's too much for one mind to handle on its own. Help is nice, and needed, to sort through such a heavy thing.


You are the 'lucky ones' that get the full gauntlet of this. I sit down, stare at the little, blinking cursor for one split second, and then let in flow. But if you don't know me in real life, then you don't know that I have it much more pulled together. It's not that I hide it, it's just that I don't have a tendency of letting my emotions or complaints drip all over the place like I do on here. Here is where I delve in. Here is the place I unlatch the lock, and access some of the deepest, darkest depths.

I have recently realized though, I have to be careful what I feed in. If I'm not continuously doing 'the work' then what is going to and through me, the emotions that are cycling, might not be as fresh as they can be. As I work on myself, the writing in turn, becomes better, the thoughts, the ideas, the concepts become more clear. The cyclical energy flowing to and through is pulsating, rather than regurgitated garbage.

Working On My Fitness!

And Uncle Roger is my witness! I told him I would go back to the gym, knowing he comes over to visit every Friday and would hold me accountable! That's a blessing and a curse all rolled into one!

All the way up until the accident, I had been a gym rat. I was going 5 days a week prior, and after...forget about it. It was all about the hospital and The Institute Program. But, that program kept us in really good shape! Since we have changed gears, and Avi is in school now, I knew it was definitely time to go back. She's only getting heavier, and with lifting, carrying and transferring her all day, I better start being more careful : ) It has felt mostly good to be back.

Now that this crazy summer sun is starting to go away, I am looking forward to getting back out into the best season of all...FALL!! I sure wish Avi had liked that backpack we got her because we will be taking them on walks again soon!


I am a downloading fool, literally. Along with writing, music saves me. I have an entire post written about music and the affects it has, but for now - all I have to say is, we listen to music from sun up, to sun down, and for the most part, things are always happy and upbeat in this household! But when I am alone, and something hits me for a moment, I escape in whatever it is that happens to be on at the time. I become whatever song is playing. For that needed timeframe, I let the song's lyrics carry me away. And then, I'm back, and I'm okay again. They are that powerful.


Some may not love Oprah, but I love me some Oprah! I record so many shows on the OWN Network including, Lifeclass, Super Soul Sunday, Master Class, and Breakthrough. Every time I watch, I can't get over how amazing, and how much there is to each of these shows. It is absolutely mind blowing. I don't ever use that phrase and am now, because it just is!

My DVR was literally stacked full with all the new season's episodes, and still is to a large extent. See, I just let things go....but I'm getting through. Even the small portion I have watched thus far has done so much good already though!


I put the books down again, and really shouldn't have. Reading takes me outside myself and into another world. It is vitally important for me to take the blinders off, and see outside my own narrow focus.  As seeing into another world helps me to explore around, gather so many useful tools, and then come back into my very own situation as more useful than I ever could have been on my own.

Every time I read, the very same thing eyes scan from right to left, and with each swipe of the page, and every bit of my being, I know full well the importance that lies within these pages. So then I am left wondering once again...why was it that I ever put these down? 

Some books I read time and again, and some I have just picked up for the first time and just began.  

The Power of Now
A New Earth
Be Here Now
The Book of Awakening
No Death, No Fear


The very act of giving has a way of filling me like no other. And when I say no other, I feel it, in a way, trumps every single one of the things I have written here today. So this is by far my favorite on here, I guess that's why I saved the best for last : )

When I say the word giving, I mean giving of anything, monetary, to a charity, a donation, a gift for family or a friend, but also of time, or of something whipped up in the kitchen, a card for no reason, or just love, like words in an email, or an off the wall, long rambling text about anything or nothing at know if you're a friend of've gotten your fair share of those...awwww, my gift to you, whether you like it, or not! The gift that keeps on giving.


  So those are the places I've been going recently. Where are the places you go? I'm always looking for more.

I've tried meditating so many times, and I plan on trying some more, but I think I need to lock Rainey out of med time...she knocks me off my chi...hee ; )


  1. Well some days I feel like I don't have to have it all figured out today, my issues will still be there tomorrow so maybe I'll work on them then. So at those times I go read on the TMZ website, watch youtube videos, or get lost in Netflix. Driving in the car listening to music I also find helpful. Note: music must be REALLY loud.

    When I'm feeling strong enough to face the biggies, I go to my therapist. Sometimes she suggests books to read which I get from my local library. Going to church helps. Talking with my husband can make me feel better. But sometimes when I'm really down I just want to hold my children, usually while they are watching tv or sleeping. Being around them is like a calming medicine for my spirit.

  2. Working out. My favorite is jogging on the bayou and soaking up some nature, but lately been into lifting weights and exploring my playlists on Pandora. Afterward, I go to the spa and sit in the sauna or get a facial. Working out is good, but also a big fat martini or two is nice. :)

  3. I can't work out anymore...which kind of sucks. But the one thing missing from your list was the beach. I NEED the sand between my toes and the salty air when everything is going down the drain. I would live there if I could...but the beach is my Tahoe, if you will. I find myself going back to the beaches we visited as kids - Stinson and Dillon beaches. Sometimes Drake's beach. Sometimes the Presidio or Marine Headlands.

  4. Thank you :) your words always have a way to lift me up~